Thursday, April 18, 2024

LAMPOON: the Weekly Gossip (tWG): Check out this new personality test!

by Frustrated social media influencer | April 30, 2023

This week’s gossip brought to you by the Weekly Gossip (tWG), the newest personality test about you! The bots farm finally reaped the harvest (pun intended) of the newest advances in technology by programming itself to create a personality test for internet-scrollers. 

Some say it’s a sham, but believers argue it is AI.

One-hit Wonder

Are your takes “cancellable”?

The online world is a very very harsh place. Hot takes never fail to draw flak. From liberated views that spite the online Marites-es to the eternal conversation on what is a relationship’s bare minimum, the internet just doesn’t let any topic miss.

If you are just ready to handle the heat of the kitchen, and you are on the lookout for the next viral video then this is you! But tread this path with caution if you don’t want to be the next face of – wait for it –the next living meme.

Strength: Unbothered

Weakness: Bad publicity

Greatness Guru

You are probably just one step away from a mental breakdown thanks to your stable routines. Living on overnight oats (probably) and motivation, we’ll just dare ask, how do you even do that?

When you are either a morning person or the type of person who is trying to be just that on social media, then you are definitely the Greatness Guru. And for sure it is a no brainer that we binge-watch your content to feed our daily tank of motivation towards greatness, promising ourselves that tomorrow is the day we change (but we still don’t).

Strength: Wakes up before the sun

Weakness: Sleeps early

Binge-watcher

Aren’t we all?

Do I still have to explain? 

We’re stuck in the loop of the algorithm that favors our wants but not our needs. That’s the headline.

Strength: Self-aware  

Weakness: Stubborn

Do you resonate with a certain personality above? If not, don’t fret. We’ll feed you gossip and trends again next week only here on the Weekly Gossip!

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