By John Madrazo | February 14, 2024
Unrequited love hurts, especially around Valentine’s Day. No matter what, it hurts. The feeling of being infatuated with someone colors your world and orients your mind toward a goal: being with them. But the reality of a relationship’s unrequited nature can undoubtedly bring forth malaise, covering the world you once thought would be full of hope.
It may make us question: Is love worth it? While certain types of love could prove to be worthwhile, others may not hold the same value. But even if emotions—by nature—may not always be within our control, we have the power to decide how we respond to them. As such, one must shift focus and realize what relationships are worth pursuing and which are not.
Relationships characterized by mutual respect, effective communication, shared values, and a sense of support and understanding contribute positively to the well-being of an individual. While it may cause us to feel—colloquially speaking—delulu about it, the primary factor in deciding if a relationship is worth pursuing and investing time and energy in is reciprocity.
You, like almost everyone around you, are viewing the world through personal lenses. You may subconsciously color the perception of interactions, viewing it in your emotional filter, creating a subjective reality woven to fit your desires. Each glance, each gesture, and every word is processed through this individual lens, shaping the narrative of a “romance.” Thus, a delulu person is born.
But we know that you usually can’t help falling for someone. Feelings are feelings; they are usually illogical, do not consistently align with your expectations, and are influenced by life experiences. Living for the hope of it all makes us not want to let go because, perhaps, they might just learn to like you.
It isn’t as simple as that, however. It’s not really about deciding if it’s worth it. It’s more about becoming better at figuring yourself and others out so you can decide how to handle matters such as knowing when to step back when you’re into someone and realizing you’re putting in more than they’re ready to give back. This concept goes for friendships as much as it does for romantic endeavors.
All relationships we get to experience teach us lessons, but it is ultimately up to us whether or not we choose to apply these lessons to ourselves. When you find yourself in this situation, you’ll get better over time at navigating them and taking new lessons. After all, being human is about having emotions and higher-level understanding.
So, to Cupid: for God’s sake, hit us both next time.
John T. Madrazo is a first-year Bachelor of Science in Pharmacy student from the College of Arts and Sciences.
